Feet

Okay, I've tried for days not to post this one but there are some things that just need to be said.

Feet (in general)
- if your feet smell like you got gangrene, keep your shoes on
- if you have calluses on the top of your feet, wear enclosed shoes
- if athlete's foot is not a disorder for you but a chronic disease, you need to see a professional
- if there is hair sprouting from your toes that's long enough to braid #stopit
- if your toe nails look like I would need a meat cleaver to cut them #nasty
- 

Sandals: um,

- if your heel looks like someone pasted plastic snow on them, you should not wear sandals
- if your toes look like you let your dog use them as a chew toy or someone hated you enough to bang them all with a hammer - repeatedly, you should not have on sandals
- if you have a growth - aka a bunion - on the side of you foot that looks like another damn toe, you should not have on sandals
- if you cannot be bothered to put on lotion, you should not have on sandals,


Now I know we can't all afford weekly or even bi weekly pedicures but damn! At least buy a pumice stone, or a filer or a ped-egg or something to take to them bad boys before you start showing them off to the world

Peep toe:

- now ladies I know that in a hurry you might be tempted to only polish the toes that will be seen but if that is the case keep your damn shoes on so no one is the wiser. SMDH, I swear, I man come on ladies, get grown with it. You cannot be half stepping on the personal upkeep
- FYI, if your visible toes have scuff marks on the bottom then chances are you've outgrown those peep toes
- if your big toes is the size of Nebraska to the point where only it can fit through the peep toe creating bumps in the rest of your shoe because the rest of your toes are crammed all up in there, damn and ew, you will have corns #drschollstotherescue

Red toe nail polish
#aint4everybody

Flip flops:
People regardless of what you believe, these need to be washed once in a while and why they hell your feet look like you've been walking barefoot #fail

Cankles:
#juststopit, #rightnow

Toenail:
Who the hell gets tips on their damn toe nails anyway??? Who the hell thought up that ignorant mess? I mean really? Do they need to curve? That's why your shoes don't fit, you gotta buy 'em 2 sizes too big to fit those claws in there

Shoes:
Ladies when you can see the bumps of your corns on the outside of the shoe it's time to do two things
- get rid of that old ass shoe and
- invest in dr. scholl's corn removers

Ladies, it's getting sad to see men wearing heels better than us. I mean, seriously, you're walking on the side of the shoe! Surely, you realize that ain't normal! Yo ass wasn't born bow-legged #stopit #rightthisinstant
People once they get holes in them, if you can't afford some glue to repair them or be able to replace them, just go barefoot. It's alot less embarrassing. I don't want to watch your shoes try to talk to me as you walk

Sneakers:
I remember growing up the only people who wore sneakers with Velcro straps were either elderly, had learning difficulties, or were those special kids in class who hadn't learned how to tie them yet. When did Velcro become an adult style? The only sneakers you should have on with Velcro straps are Reebok's or Nike and no one actually uses them, they just hang off to the side! #overit

Socks:
Wear them #yeahi'mtalkingtoyou

And finally, to the population of women in London: BLACK TIGHTS DO NOT GO WITH FREAKING EVERYTHING!!!!!

Thanks for listening, muah!

Oh, and stop this shit......